00:11.0
because f**k you, that's why.
00:12.7
I'll be the guy with the Vespa.
00:14.3
There has to be a boat here, bro.
00:16.7
Oh, s**t, fishing!
00:18.1
Hey, gloco, can you ready, please?
00:23.4
Ganda-ganda ng laro natin
00:24.8
tapos mumurahin mo ko.
00:26.7
The game of life right there, bro.
00:28.4
Kaya magandang laro.
00:29.7
Sometimes life just, you know, gives you lemons, bro.
00:32.6
You know what they say, man.
00:34.0
When life gives you lemons,
00:35.2
squirt them in the eyes with it.
00:36.4
Alright, alright, Neil.
00:37.7
Do you know how to play this game?
00:40.4
College, pay 100k to level up your education
00:43.1
and you'll get better job.
00:46.5
Get a job now and earn your siyempre!
00:48.8
Siyempre, wag ka na mag-school.
00:49.9
Maging YouTuber ka na.
00:51.5
Tama, tama, mag-career ka na.
00:53.8
Pet groomer, pre!
00:55.4
Yakadiri ka pala, nag-group ka na.
00:56.8
You're stuck with just a job.
00:57.6
You're a level...
01:00.2
There are three levels of it.
01:01.3
Man, nakita ko yung basketball, yung bola.
01:04.1
Ito agad, siyempre.
01:09.3
Sana mag-play yung career mo.
01:13.5
Nah, I'm gonna get a rare comic book.
01:15.5
Anong papasaya mo sa comic?
01:18.3
Ng Marvel, siyempre.
01:22.5
I'm going to college.
01:24.8
Ano ka lang doon ng mga boylet, eh.
01:28.1
You're gonna join a frat.
01:29.1
You don't know that?
01:30.3
Hindi ka sure, oi.
01:31.6
Oh, laser tag battle.
01:37.0
Yeah, I got nine.
01:38.9
Vanilla, si Vanilla.
01:40.9
Spin, what the f**k?
01:48.5
Spin like you like...
01:49.7
F**king let it go, you f**king a**.
01:51.4
Ay, pa'no mo mag-spin, po?
01:58.0
I got eight, bro.
02:03.5
Sa tri-nil, bobo yan, eh.
02:13.5
Tanggal na, boi. I got investment doon sa college.
02:15.3
Kumikita ka pala sa college?
02:18.7
Mas mataas magkita mo sa college kasi sa...
02:23.9
This time, it's not just about money.
02:25.7
It's about who you choose to be.
02:28.5
Kailangan ko ng happiness in wealth, okay?
02:30.5
F**k the knowledge, bro.
02:33.5
So, karere din tayo, okay?
02:35.3
Ay! Maganding karere mo!
02:39.3
Gusto ko na ma-YouTuber!
02:42.4
Saru pa ang bata para magka-karere, okay?
02:46.7
I'm gonna mooch off my parents' money first, okay?
02:51.4
Actually, it's your money.
02:58.8
Kailangan ko rin i-upgrade yung-
03:00.2
Ano ko pang Minecraft, oy?
03:02.7
Kasi masisirahan ako ng ulo sa college.
03:03.9
Bro, it's Lamdang Contest.
03:05.3
Para mo, 100k ka.
03:06.7
P**a, I don't even f**king play.
03:16.8
Turning here is so stupid, bro.
03:18.8
Okay, it's you, bro.
03:29.8
I beat him in his own game.
03:31.4
Eh, naman, mabola tayo sa nabas ngayon.
03:44.0
It's a draw still.
03:44.6
Draw, draw, draw, draw, draw.
03:57.5
Paalam, college pand.
04:00.8
P**ang ina, ginagaralan ni Tygiel.
04:02.9
Walang pinag-aralan.
04:06.2
P**ang ina sa naman!
04:08.8
Oh, he stopped college, bro!
04:10.7
What does that mean?
04:11.8
Nag-graduate na siya!
04:12.5
Nag-graduate na siya!
04:14.7
He gonna have the best...
04:16.0
I'm about to have a good life, man.
04:17.7
He about to have...
04:21.1
Video game designer!
04:23.6
P**ang ina sa naman!
04:25.7
Grade school na nung college, g**o.
04:27.7
Watch a stream, game.
04:29.2
Mananood ako ng gloco gaming, g**o.
04:32.4
Ay, train to Busan, pre.
04:34.7
Oh, and I feel like I'm gonna fail in life so much.
04:42.8
Kala ko tapos na yun!
04:43.9
Huwag mo mo naman mag-spin!
04:45.2
Just f**king flick it!
04:46.4
I am flicking it!
04:49.3
Nag-graduate na rin so far!
04:50.4
Nag-graduate na ako, p**ang ina.
04:52.1
Tapos ng suldo ko dito sa robotics.
04:53.9
Pero ang tax ko lakay rin.
04:57.2
I wanna make robots.
04:58.3
Gagawa ko ng ano?
05:00.6
I'm gonna make androids, bro.
05:05.8
College is doing it, bro!
05:08.1
Paano ka maulit ng 2B
05:09.3
kung di ka mag-upgrade ng PC?
05:11.2
That is f**king true, man!
05:12.8
I need a good-a** PC
05:14.5
to make my good-a** robots, bro.
05:16.2
Oh, you have the most wealth, p**a!
05:20.7
Laka nung dam pero.
05:26.5
Did you get married?
05:29.0
Are you looking at me saying this, is it?
05:30.7
Yo, what the f**k?
05:32.0
Shut the f**k up, man!
05:37.3
Ano din, tanga to?
05:38.3
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!
05:39.3
Oh, it's a 4-man.
05:42.1
Oh, it's say pera ka.
05:45.1
Ay, matik na mag-
05:51.0
Di ba yung ginagawa pag may camera?
05:53.8
Siyempre, I'm-a get this.
05:56.1
Sana all may happiness.
05:57.7
Sana all ganyan, no?
06:06.0
Are you f**king kidding me?
06:07.2
Thanks for the free money, Chris!
06:08.8
Nanood kasi siya ng vlog ko.
06:11.2
Nanood kasi siya ng vlog ko na bilhin niya ako revenue.
06:14.9
It's time for me to graduate.
06:16.1
I'm gonna go to college, man!
06:17.9
Nag-videoblogger nga pala ako na agad.
06:21.3
Get a raise or get a new job?
06:23.2
Siyempre, tangina, we all about that corporate rat life.
06:27.2
We gotta get a raise, bro.
06:28.2
Hanggang mag-i-CEO tayo.
06:39.0
Pag-inig ka na, siyempre!
06:40.0
Sa deal ay po tayo na gusto mo bahay.
06:43.1
Siyempre, magkakasawa siya.
06:44.5
Magkakaanak sila.
06:51.1
Ay, may pera pa rin.
06:53.0
Oh my God, it's red.
06:55.6
Kay Chris ang kumuha?!
06:58.0
Oh, takin na siya lahat!
06:59.0
Thank you, mga Nino!
07:05.5
There you go, Chris.
07:06.0
Ano ka, dance lighting?
07:08.0
Putangin na may magagalit pag...
07:11.5
It's fictional, Chris!
07:12.5
What do you mean, bro?
07:14.5
Get married, bro!
07:15.0
Get married, bro!
07:16.0
Nasabi ni Kyle, oh, get married, bro!
07:17.0
Oh, nga, nga, nga!
07:19.0
Putangin na lang!
07:24.3
Magiging editor ako ni Gloco Gaming, gago!
07:29.3
Nanonood ka lang ng video niya dati
07:30.8
tas naging editor!
07:35.3
What a life, Chris!
07:39.8
Kuta, nakita ko sa buhay ng single
07:41.8
mas maraming pera, okay?
07:45.3
Nariwin na second thought.
07:50.1
Pusin pera ko, gago!
07:51.1
Pero masyadong daanan din pera, oh!
07:56.6
Take, after landing on this space
07:58.1
you get to spin and let luck decide your fate.
08:00.6
You might get to grow your family,
08:02.1
buy a house, or even pay taxes.
08:04.1
Iyan ang gusto ko!
08:05.6
Never go against fate, okay?
08:11.1
Here goes my money!
08:11.6
Nakuha ka ng BIR, gago!
08:13.1
Nauhuling ka ng BIR!
08:18.4
Siyempre mag-single ako, puta!
08:22.4
Sarap ng buhay single eh, puta!
08:32.4
Salamat sa pag-edit ng videos, gago!
08:34.4
Dito natin malalaman, oh!
08:37.4
Nakuha ng BIR, pre!
08:39.4
Pabahayin naman ako ng ano, ah!
08:47.7
How do you do it?
08:48.7
How did you do it?
08:49.7
Wala nga sa knowledge ko, bro!
09:00.7
Ang dami mong ninong dito, eh!
09:03.7
Thank you, mga ninong!
09:05.7
Putang ina talagang lala!
09:10.2
Sa bank ko kinuha!
09:10.7
Feeling ko ako yun!
09:11.7
Pero wala na akong pera!
09:13.7
Patay ako sa bank!
09:21.0
This guy's winning life, bro!
09:25.0
Pangit pa rin ng trabaho ako!
09:26.0
Walking ina na yan!
09:30.0
Maginiyo naman akong pera!
09:33.0
Papakasala si Chris!
09:34.0
Papakasala si Chris!
09:35.0
Papakasala si Chris!
09:36.0
I'm gonna get gay marriage!
09:40.0
What the fuck are you saying, man?
09:42.0
I thought you were gonna do gay marriage, bro!
09:43.0
I thought you were slightly gay, Chris!
09:47.3
Malapit na mag-millionaire, gang!
09:53.3
Putangin na mo yan na agad!
10:07.3
This fucking game, bro!
10:09.3
Malaroon tayo ng game ito
10:10.3
tapos pinapakita sa atin yung future natin!
10:13.6
No bullshit, boys!
10:23.6
Nakawanan din kayo na ako!
10:25.6
Siyempre, bahay muna!
10:26.6
Siyempre, ano muna?
10:27.6
Invest mo na tayo kasi
10:29.6
Investment is me!
10:30.6
Tama, tama, tama!
10:31.6
Magpayaman muna bago mag-pamilya, tama?
10:37.6
Kung mayroong pera ako,
10:38.6
may bilhin ko yung cozy cottage!
10:40.9
Character to happy-go-lucky!
10:42.9
Okay, ayoko niyan!
10:50.9
Ang gusto mo, mansion?
10:52.9
Kailan niyo ako bibigyan ng ayuda?
10:56.9
Everyone has houses now!
11:01.9
Damn, he living life!
11:02.9
I'm dodging those tax boards
11:04.9
just like I dodge my taxes in real life!
11:06.9
No, you can't say that, Chris!
11:09.2
Here goes my money!
11:12.2
I'm broke as hell!
11:14.2
Unlike this guy over here!
11:16.2
Unlike this guy over here!
11:18.2
Nagka-utang pao, buisen!
11:22.2
This is my life, bro!
11:23.2
I can already see it!
11:24.2
I'm in a missed timeline, bro!
11:28.2
Okay, life is not a race, okay?
11:34.2
Napunta sa tax, gago!
11:37.2
Laki na tax, bro!
11:41.5
May utang pa ako!
11:44.5
May lista sa bank ko, pre!
11:45.5
Please, something good, bro!
11:47.5
Hindi ko kailan kung mag-aral!
11:49.5
Baod ka na sa utang, pre!
11:52.5
Tatlo na yung utang ko, gago!
11:55.5
Oh my God, this life!
11:57.5
Graduate na ako, finally, bro!
11:59.5
Student debt, puta!
12:02.5
Mountain of student debt, bro!
12:06.5
Okay, there we go!
12:07.8
Tax evaded, let's go!
12:14.8
Mahal ng taxi mo, eh!
12:15.8
No, I should join you!
12:16.8
I join you, I join you!
12:18.8
Masisira buhay mo dito!
12:19.8
Look at my life right now, bro!
12:21.8
It's just a stepping stone, okay?
12:23.8
Pre, nobody fucking goes through number one!
12:31.8
Okay, I take it back!
12:33.8
Why would I go across?
12:34.8
Lumog ako sa ocean!
12:35.8
Pre, pre, Pinoy kayo!
12:39.1
What the fuck, man?
12:41.1
Sinong buhay ito?
12:44.1
Learn another language!
12:45.1
I'mma learn German!
12:48.1
Oh, winner costume contest, oh!
12:50.1
100k from opponent!
12:52.1
Sinong pinaka-buya-
12:54.1
Sinong pinaka-buya-
12:55.1
Masisira buhay mo, okay?
12:56.1
Bias na mong dyan siya, guys!
12:57.1
Tabi ko sa'yo, eh!
12:58.1
Tabi ko sa'yo, eh!
13:02.1
Seven, one, two, three!
13:07.1
Damn, you won the-
13:12.1
Okay, we're selling house.
13:13.1
You have six offers.
13:14.1
Each hidden inside the envelope,
13:15.1
open it with the offer,
13:17.1
If you don't like the offer,
13:18.1
you can choose another envelope
13:20.1
However, if you don't-
13:22.1
Pinaka-matas na offer!
13:24.1
500k, yun yung pinaka-tas mo!
13:27.1
Sinong pinakatila talagang buhay ito, Dil!
13:32.1
The game ends when everyone is retired.
13:34.1
The final score will be calculated based on money,
13:36.4
and attributes collected through entire life.
13:40.4
I'mma go pension, man.
13:42.4
Puta, he wants the easy life.
13:44.4
He wants the easy life, bro.
13:48.4
No, we're not happy.
13:49.4
No, I'm happy, too!
13:51.4
He's- Damn, he happy,
13:52.4
and he has fucking nothing.
13:55.4
I'mma throw a party.
13:57.4
Walang punta yun.
13:59.4
Maglalagay yung puso, eh.
14:00.4
Kailangan ko malamangan si Vanilla.
14:05.7
My life as a corporate rat, man.
14:07.7
I'm gonna grow old and miserable.
14:11.7
Mahabol mo si Dil.
14:12.7
Please, please, please.
14:13.7
Puta, isang milyon to!
14:16.7
Please, 300 lahat.
14:17.7
Oh, for fuck's sake!
14:20.7
Tanggan na 10k lang yung profit mo dun.
14:29.7
sabi ko sa'yo, pangit ng trabaho natin, eh.
14:32.7
life is not a race, okay?
14:34.0
A second chance to get married?
14:36.0
A second chance to get married, bro!
14:40.0
I get more money.
14:41.0
It's time to settle down and be happy, bro.
14:43.0
It's time to be gay.
14:44.0
It's time to be gay, bro.
14:45.0
It's time to be slightly gay.
14:46.0
It's time to be slightly gay, bro.
14:48.0
I gotta be progressive now, eh.
14:50.0
I gotta be repping them.
14:54.0
milyonaryo na ako.
14:58.0
I'mma make a snail farm, bro.
15:03.3
He bought that hustling life, bro.
15:09.3
The risky part, though.
15:12.3
You wanna risk it?
15:17.3
You're wrong, you're wrong.
15:18.3
You're not gonna get taxed.
15:19.3
Are you sure about that?
15:24.3
I lived such a mediocre life.
15:26.3
Money is not everything, okay?
15:28.3
Hindi niyo mga sinasabi ng mga taong
15:30.3
wala pera or yung may pinaka...
15:32.6
Sobrang dami pera.
15:36.6
No, this game may be real.
15:39.6
See? Exactly, bro.
15:44.6
Utang na naman ako.
15:50.6
Time to kill myself.
15:57.6
Then you live in a fucking trailer, bro.
16:00.6
Gagagawa met doon tayo.
16:07.6
Tatagal ko yung buhay ko.
16:11.6
Hindi ako trabaho.
16:17.6
Ahabul ako sa knowledge.
16:18.6
I'm gonna be at least smarter than you, bro.
16:20.6
Now you're watching my life, bro.
16:26.6
My life is not fulfilled, bro.
16:29.6
Wala akong bahay.
16:30.6
Wala akong nothing.
16:31.9
I got nothing, bro.
16:34.9
Siya pa yung namalan.
16:36.9
Tanginang buhay ito, pre.
16:39.9
Sana ma-easy kaya ako.
16:40.9
Let's see who has the highest score.
16:50.9
Siyempre, try nil yan.
17:01.2
You live in the light.
17:28.9
Thank you for watching!