We asked these young Filipinos yes or no questions if they still want to have kids, and is it okay to choose not to? FOLLOW THEM Sab - https://www.instagram.com/sabjose/ Reb - https://www.instagram.com/rebranger/ Bien - https://www.instagram.com/kaiser.reels/ Sophie - https://www.instagram.com/sophie.ypchngco/ Aldrin - https://www.instagram.com/drin2thou/ Ninya - https://www.instagram.com/ninyabnormal/ BOOK YOUR TICKETS! https://premier.ticketworld.com.ph/shows/show.aspx?sh=SANDFEST23 __________________________________________________ WANT TO HAVE YOUR OWN PHOTOSHOOT? CHECK OUT THIS SELF-SHOOT STUDIO! https://www.instagram.com/studiopersona.ph/ https://studiopersonaxrecreate.youcanbook.me/ Use our special code "RECCREATESP10" for 10% discount! WANT OUR MERCH? CHECK OUT OUR OFFICIAL STORE! https://shopee.ph/reccreate WANT TO COLLABORATE? EMAIL US! reccreatestudios@gmail.com ABOUT REC•CREATE This channel stars your ordinary Filipino and their more than ordinary personalities through fun and honest video

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Yes or no, you need to sacrifice a part of yourself to have kids?

Yes. You really do.

It's a responsibility.

Kailangan mong panindigan.

Binuhay mo sila, you know.

It is your burden, actually.

Yes or no, I would like to have children?

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Yeah, I do. I love kids.

When I was younger, I always thought, you know,

the biggest thing that I want to do in life is to be a good dad.

As corny as that is, that is really how I feel.

That's always how I felt.

I have a big family. I have five siblings.

I just, I dream of having, like, a really big family.

I could say na I was raised well by my parents.

I was so loved by my parents.

Tsaka they were so supportive.

Supportive to me in every way.

Somehow I want to replicate that.

Initially, I was on the fence because I have an autoimmune disorder.

So I wasn't sure kung matutuloy yun.

And secondly, I was focusing on my career.

Kasi as an actor, may shelf life ka diba?

So parang by the age of like 35, parang

paano na yung roles, diba?

Puro mga tita, mom na yung roles.

I was really hoping to make the most of my youth.

Yuck, youth!

I'm 34, and I started hosting parties,

children's parties at 17.

And I will never forget the very first day I did it.

I dressed up as the Red Ranger, Power Ranger.

I'm an actor, but I felt silly in that outfit.

But when the kid, the kid was celebrating that birthday,

saw me and was like,

Power Rangers!

And immediately something clicked in my head like,

okay, it just felt like,

okay, I can probably do this as a dad.

From then on, that seed just kept growing.

And then yung pandemic, ayun, siyempre, nabuntis.

So, walang choice.

And when it happened though, it was the best.

It was the best miracle.

It was the best unplanned baby.

I see it as a fulfillment for me.

And I see it as a sense of purpose in my life.

I see parenthood as an essential thing

or part of my life.

No.

The reason why I don't like to have my own kid,

primarily because of the climate situation

that we are experiencing right now.

I come from a broken family.

As a psych major, I don't want to pass unresolved trauma.

I know that it's me na magkakat ng vicious cycle of trauma.

In that case, we can save a child

na hindi niya ma-experience yung mga naranasan natin from the past.

Doon ako napipressure sa point na

pag in-open up ko yung topic na yun,

ang lagi nilang sasabi sa akin is,

magbabago pa yan?

Paano ka pag tumanda ka?

Sino magaalaga sa'yo?

Actually, it's something ironic.

I am good with kids.

But deep down inside me,

parang hindi ko makita for now yung self ko

na magiging parent in the near future.

I can consider kasi myself as the breadwinner of,

at the same time, ng family.

Dahil pinapaaral ko yung bunso kong kapatid.

So, parang doon palang mama na ako ng kapatid ko.

Feeling ko yung pagiging parent

or pagiging mother is really not my interest talaga.

It's more practical to not have kids.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Oh yeah.

I would agree with that.

I can say yes.

Hindi mo iisipan when you're going out.

Like, if you're going out on a date,

kailangan, like, baby-friendly.

Kailangan yung pagkain baby-friendly.

Kailangan may highchair, may stroller.

It's the most expensive thing you can do.

Let's be honest, everybody.

It's not buying a car.

It's not buying a house.

Here's a human being, you know?

And I'm gonna put it through school.

I'm gonna buy clothes.

I'm gonna feed it.

In the future, mahirap pa paraalan

because of the inflation.

Kung mahal na nga na,

mas magmamahal pa in the future.

So, if we're only talking about practicality

in terms of money, finances,

absolutely.

It's very practical to not have kids

because we're all aware na overpopulated ang Philippines

and then limited na yung mga resources natin.

Ang hirap nang ambuhayin nung sarili mo, eh.

Tapos magdadala ka pa ng isang human being

na hindi siya basta-basta as a pet lang

na pwede mong iwan sa parents mo

or pwede mong iwan.

If you don't have the capacity

or if you don't have the ability

to make the life of your child easier

than your life now,

I guess hindi talaga siya practical.

Is it selfish to not have kids?

Uh, no.

No.

I think it's not.

Absolutely not.

No, I don't think so.

I think yung decision of

whether to have kids or not

is very personal and very subjective, no.

Yeah.

Ang choice na not to have a kid,

I see it as equally valid sa to have a child.

I had so much anxiety about

the world I was going to bring a child into, potentially.

So yun yung main hesitation ko.

I mean, who thought na we were gonna have

another war, nama, in the world?

In the pandemic, we didn't really expect it to happen, nama.

There's just so much to think about,

so I don't think it's selfish to

want to think about yourself,

to want to live your life without

thinking about another person.

Kasi hindi naman selfishness na

piliin mo muna yung self mo for now.

There's a lot more that you should discover about yourself.

Feel ko magiging great parent ka

kapag mas na-discover mo yung self mo

and mas fulfilled ka

kung ano ba yung career path na gusto mo for yourself.

For me, uh, siguro nang galing siya

kasi parang innate na pagbabae ka

na parang ang purpose mo,

ang end-of-life purpose mo is

dapat may anak ka, dapat nanay ka.

It has been drilled into our heads,

not only through religion,

and mostly through religion,

that, you know, you have to go forth and multiply.

Let's face it, it also comes from a place that

you want someone to take care of you when you get older.

I think yun yung notion here in the Philippines na

hala, paano ako pagtumanda?

Sino mag-aalaga sa akin?

Kailangan natin umalis dun sa ganong thinking

kasi una sa lahat, hindi naman retirement pa ng bata.

Yung dad ko kasi, um, very traditional.

So parang sinasabi niya,

oh, kailangan magkapamilya kayo,

kaya nagsisimba kayo,

tapos dadalhin niyo yung mga anak niyo.

Tapos parang cue niya,

obligation talaga na magka-family.

Diba, there's a lot of things that we can do now,

and hindi tayo limited dun sa box na

kailangan natin i-follow yung sa society na

there's a norm na after mag-romadate, mag-awork ka.

After ng work mo, mag-aasawa ka and mag-aanap.

Dapat burahin natin sa isipan natin yung

certain time frame, timeline na sinusunod ng marami.

I think it's actually also selfless in a way

to not bring another person into the world

na kung hindi mo rin siya maaalagaan, diba,

parang why, why, why subject this child to that, diba?

We must remember that

there is no wrong choice in the question

whether to have kids or not.

But rather, what is wrong is

believing to the idea that there is a right choice.

Yes or no, you need to sacrifice a part of yourself to have kids?

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

You really do.

And I don't resent that.

I don't take it against my child.

Bringing the baby into the world,

your baby really comes first.

And it's a fact of life.

It's a fact of motherhood, of parenthood.

Once na nagka-anak ka na,

a huge part of your life

dapat ibigay mo sa anak mo.

It's not just you anymore.

It's a responsibility na kailangang panindigans.

Binuhin mo sila, you know?

It is your burden, actually.

Even when you're in a relationship,

you do sacrifice your me-time, right?

For women, you know, because they have to be nursing.

They have to be there all the time.

But I did have moments, especially yung

siguro yung mga first three months of postpartum na parang,

oh my God, ito na lang ba yung buhay ko?

Parang magpapadadaday ka lang every two hours.

So, parang, ay, hindi na ako nakaligo.

I don't regret it.

It's more of, mapapayisip ka talaga.

Parang, is this it now?

Siguro yun yung kailangang prepared ka emotionally.

And bilang lalaki naman,

siguro you should be a great provider.

I'm not saying na dapat mas great provider

ang lalaki compared sa babae.

But, you know, yung stability ba

na kaya mong i-provide sa bata.

It doesn't scare me.

Sacrificing a part of myself,

it doesn't scare me.

I'm scared of how it will change

my relationship with my wife, right?

Because there's a kid in the middle, right?

The attention will have to go to the kid most of the time.

The kid's the boss, right?

Actually, parang pag nag-aanok ka,

parang wala ka ng privacy,

wala na yung, wala na yung mean niya.

Parang, it's a completely different person na.

I think it's not just partially, eh.

It's 100% completely different na sa individual self mo

compared sa pagiging mother self mo, eh.

Siguro it depends.

I feel like I'm not gonna have to sacrifice anything.

I like a part of myself for my kids naman, eh.

Kasi they're a part of me.

I don't think it's actually a sacrifice.

It's more on giving your love to someone

and that's not a sacrifice at all.

Eventually, the fog,

the fog of motherhood kind of lifts

and you realize na

you still can do things for yourself.

And yung mama guilt will eventually,

you'll eventually get better at dealing with it.

It's okay to love yourself

and love your baby at the same time.

Life would be more complete if you had children?

Oh my gosh!

For me, yes.

No.

Uh, no.

It depends.

I think that's relative.

Not necessarily.

Completing your life.

It's objective, isn't it?

I see it as a fulfillment in my sense of purpose in life.

Like, I've always envisioned myself to be a parent.

It's a parang success siya sa akin.

I don't think I need a child to feel complete.

I just want one because I know I could do it

and I know I would love that kid no matter what.

For me, it did complete me as a person

because I've always wanted to have kids.

But for the people who choose not to have children,

that's okay and any choice is valid.

My gosh, they get to see the world.

I don't because I have a child, diba?

They get to do so many different things like

live in different countries,

just travel all over the world,

not think about another baby

and that doesn't make them any less complete.

It's not a shame or you shouldn't feel guilty

about not having a child.

There are a lot of singles out there

or they decided not to have child talaga

and they still feel fulfilled in their life.

The fulfillment of having the child or having a children,

nakukuha ko siya with other people na nasa buhay ko ngayon.

Like for example, I have a niece so ini-spoiled ko talaga siya.

So parang yung fulfillment na maging mother material din ako

for my niece pero not to the point na talaga akin siya.

Kasi mas gusto ko yung nababalik ko.

Yung pag kinakarga ko siya ng ilang minutes lang,

gusto ko ibabalik ko na agad siya.

Gano'n, yes.

Yung old-fashioned way of thinking lang as a woman,

you need to have a baby to feel complete

but I don't believe in that.

And that's coming from a mother now, ha.

Parang it just so happens na for me,

my baby really,

my baby is my life.

Like, yuk na iyak ako bigla.

Ano yung kind of life do you imagine having

if you were not to have kids?

Sabi nung ate ko, she's a preschool teacher.

Sabi niya, why not teach?

Sabi niya, baka doon talaga yung calling mo.

And I think I would do that in the future.

Kasi by nurturing young minds, you empower them.

I think yun yung mas makakapagbigay sa'yo ng fulfillment

knowing na the knowledge that you've experienced

in your lifetime will be passed on the next generation.

I see myself na kasama yung partner ko

as my companion in life.

Nakikita ko lang na we are exploring the world together

and at the same time,

I really perceive myself na tutulong ako sa iba.

Yung for example, sa mga kaibigan ko na may mga babies na

if they need help, I want to be that kind of friend.

So, sobrang dami na ng mga tao sa buhay ko

na may mga anak, parang they are looking for someone

na matatakbuhan in case na may kailangan sila.

And I want to be that kind of person.

Should it be more socially accepted to choose to not have kids?

Yes.

Yes, yeah.

Absolutely, 100%.

Yes, I think.

Let's base here on the context in the Philippines.

I think hindi siya ganon ka-accepted,

but we are progressively going to that path na

mas nagiging open, ah.

I know so many older people frown upon

yung mga child-free couples,

but seriously guys, stop with the judgment, okay?

I feel like it's being socially accepted naman now,

especially in my generation.

Don't fault people.

Please, don't fault people for not wanting to have children.

Just because you did it, doesn't mean they should.

It should be socially accepted.

Let's not judge people on what they want.

Dapat wala tayong say sa decision nila.

These are personal choices.

We should not take it against these couples

who don't want to have children

because it's their choice

and it doesn't affect your life, diba?

I don't know.

Just go do you.

Do whatever makes you happy.

And if you feel like having kids would like

hold you back from that,

then don't do it.

You shouldn't pressure yourself on having a child.

I think you should embrace your solitude for now

and figure out kung ano ba talaga yung calling nyo in your life.

And in that sense,

mas dun yung makahanap kung

fit ba talaga kayo to be a parent or not.

It's okay if you have your dreams,

if you want to fulfill it first

before thinking about anything else.

And dun naman sa mga

may gusto talagang magka-family,

I believe it's also your choice

and we respect that.

Just spread more understanding

and be the person that you want to see in this world.

So, yan.

Hello, everyone. My name is Reva Tadero.

And I'm Saab Josea.

And we are two out of the four cast members of Lungs

that is happening right now

as part of Sandbox Fest 2023.

Lungs is a play about a young couple.

A young couple.

Young, young pa tayo.

A young couple.

A young couple that is deciding whether or not

to have a baby in this post-pandemic world.

You know, with all of the bells and whistles

and problems that we have in the current world.

It is very relevant.

It is one of those shows that really makes you question,

really makes you think,

and just gives you a warm hug

that you are not alone.

Exactly.

And actually, Lungs is directed by the Kaisa Borromeo.

The, yeah, the Kaisa Borromeo.

And it's actually twin billing,

or it's a double feature with Every Brilliant Thing,

which is directed by the Jenny Hamora,

starring Kaki Teodoro,

Theresa Herrera,

and John Santos,

who is joining us in a special Filipino translated staging

of Every Brilliant Thing.

So these shows will be running

at the Zobel de Ayala Recital Hall

at the Maybank Performing Arts Theater in BGC.

Ang hapa.

Ang hapa yan.

Yeah, and will be running until July 15 only.

So I really hope,

we really hope you can support the shows,

support local theater,

and just support your fellow artists.

Especially now that we're back after the pandemic.

So yes, the plague is over.

Watch a play.

Thank you.

Thank you.