00:45.1
Pahiya ako during, sa school bus.
00:48.7
Yung nananahimik lang ako from one corner,
00:51.0
tapos bigla mo nalang akong ginanoon.
00:52.7
Kung paano niya ako tawagin na kalahating mapa
00:56.6
because of my birthmark.
00:58.1
Di ko rin ina-expect, pero I remember you posting something online
01:03.2
that I did not like.
01:04.9
My friends, yung talagang circle ng friends ko
01:07.7
asked me to join a cosplay group.
01:10.1
Ako naman dahil doon, mga friends ko sobrang hilig din sa anime,
01:13.2
sobrang hilig sa Japanese culture.
01:14.4
Sabi ko, why not? Okay, sige.
01:15.8
Nagsimula lang mag-cosplay.
01:17.0
I cosplayed Yoh Asakura from Shaman King.
01:19.7
Ginawa ko siyang profile picture just because, you know, why not?
01:22.9
Once na-post ka yon, I was expecting a lot of support from my friends
01:27.6
and parang ganoon.
01:28.9
Fortunately, I didn't get any support.
01:31.0
Instead, I got a lot of really bad comments.
01:34.6
This was like a person kasi from another department.
01:37.6
It involved yung asawa niya naka-department ko
01:42.0
na yun talaga yung naka-argue ko with work.
01:44.0
Kaya lang parang in a way, siya yung parang...
01:47.3
parang pinagtanggol niya ako.
01:49.4
It was on Facebook kasi when she decided to post
01:54.1
something na hindi man ako pinangalanan,
01:56.5
pero sinabi yung department ko.
01:59.2
I think I was the only LGBT member in the company
02:02.3
calling me out na yung tomboy sa gantong ano
02:05.4
o yung tibong, yung nagisang tibong.
02:08.4
So parang, oh my God.
02:10.0
It's already 2023.
02:11.6
Why are we still making fun of people who are part of the community?
02:15.0
Medyo ang cruel nung attack kasi online.
02:17.6
Everyone can see it.
02:19.0
And most of you, mga lalaki pa,
02:21.5
kasi yung mga girls naman, grabe yung support sakin.
02:24.5
Pero kayong mga lalaki,
02:26.3
grabe yung pambubulin niyo sakin.
02:28.7
Tapos at lunchtime, may iiwasan akong hallway
02:31.6
kasi naka-abang ka doon.
02:33.3
Swerti ako kung mag-isa ka lang,
02:34.8
pero kadalasan kasi marami kayo.
02:37.2
Pag all-boys school, kasi maraming gagawan talaga eh.
02:40.7
Lalo na pag if you show signs of timidness, softness,
02:46.8
anything nang didim-weak.
02:49.3
Actually, this is the first time
02:50.9
naasabihin ko ito kasi
02:52.6
I didn't have any guts to tell this even to my closest friends.
02:56.1
But there were a lot of people
02:57.9
that threatened my life nung high school ako.
03:00.9
Just because they hated me.
03:02.4
Just because I was smart.
03:04.2
Just because I was just doing good in school.
03:06.8
There was one time, sa school bus to,
03:11.1
na-corner ako eh.
03:13.8
Pa-uwi na kami noon.
03:18.9
Or like, **** baling ka.
03:21.0
I went home crying.
03:24.4
There was this one time that
03:29.1
tapos nasa honor list ako.
03:31.3
Ako umuwi ako mag-isa.
03:32.7
While walking daw,
03:33.6
ay while walking kasi since wala ngang jeep that time,
03:38.7
someone blindfolded me,
03:40.9
then beat the hell out of me.
03:42.9
I don't know who did it,
03:44.2
but I know it's one of my bullies.
03:46.5
Pero I didn't tell my mom.
03:48.2
I didn't tell my friends.
03:49.9
I didn't tell anyone except for now.
03:52.0
At those moments, I felt
03:55.3
angry, sad, anxious, depressed.
03:59.4
First of all, siyempre nakakahiyaan.
04:01.0
Hiyakas na rin mo
04:02.9
sa klase mo, mga kaibigan mo, diba?
04:04.8
Kasi yung pain, physical pain,
04:08.3
mga mamayang gabi, wala na yan eh.
04:10.8
Pero yung part na napahiyaan ka,
04:12.9
parang hanggang ngayon nga,
04:14.0
naalala ko pa, diba?
04:15.4
Grabe yung insecurities ko before
04:17.2
dahil sa mga pinagagagawa nyo,
04:19.5
medyo na-question ko yung self ko na
04:21.6
bakit sa akin ito binigay?
04:23.2
Like, bakit may ganito ko?
04:25.2
Bumaba yung tingin ko sa sarili ko
04:28.0
na akala ko ako yung taong nabubuli lang,
04:31.5
ako yung taong kinakaya-kaya lang,
04:34.6
ako yung taong hindi pinapakinggan.
04:36.4
May times na ilang weeks ako
04:38.0
hindi na lang kumain sa cafeteria,
04:40.6
sa back office na lang ako,
04:42.4
bumibilhin na lang ako ng food somewhere,
04:44.4
so like extra gastos during that time.
04:46.9
Parang yun na lang yung response ko.
04:49.0
Normally kasi it has a
04:50.4
flight or fight mode, right?
04:51.8
I chose the flight mode.
04:53.1
So instead of having them confronting,
04:57.7
I chose to isolate myself.
05:00.0
Ang naging turning point ko was
05:01.6
my third year high school na talaga.
05:03.9
Sabi ko, it needs to stop.
05:06.0
Dahil doon, nag-ano ako,
05:09.3
nag-start ako mag-boxing for self-defense.
05:12.5
Di naman ako naging fighter dahil sa'yo,
05:14.2
di naman umiikot buhay ko sa'yo.
05:16.5
Tinake into consideration ko siya na
05:20.1
magbilang ka up until 10,
05:22.2
or something na magpapakalma sa'yo.
05:25.5
binabad ko yung sarili ko sa academics
05:28.2
like full-on, sunog kilay, aral, kamalala.
05:31.2
Nastop yung pang-bubuli sa'kin
05:33.7
nung pinakita ko sa kanila na kaya ko,
05:37.1
na kahit na paulit-ulit nila akong binubuli,
05:41.0
eh nagsishow up ako sa kanila.
05:42.8
Hindi ko kasi alam kung anong naging
05:45.4
resulta nung after kong mag-report sa HRD, eh.
05:48.8
Basta sinabihan lang ako ni boss na
05:51.4
so basta magkakaroon ng action,
05:54.0
disciplinary action.
05:55.1
So, is that like parang nanalo sa korte?
05:59.0
But yeah, nung nag-college kasi ako,
06:00.7
medyo nag-blow up naman.
06:02.6
Kaya ayan, nung nag-college ako,
06:04.1
doon kayo nag-start man ligaw.
06:06.1
Pero ayan, dahil nga binuli niya ako before,
06:09.2
ayan, pinag-mabusted ko kayong lahat.
06:12.4
So doon siya na-stop
06:13.4
kasi parang na-realize nung mga lalakay na parang,
06:16.6
ay, palaban tong babaeng to.
06:18.2
Grabe yung self-love niya sa sarili niya.
06:20.7
From there, aside sa varsity ako and officer ako,
06:24.0
doon nabuo yung confidence ko na
06:26.0
no, I'm bigger than you.
06:27.1
I'm stronger than you.
06:28.5
Naging ano, mas confident ako.
06:33.0
yung poster nung pangalan ko,
06:34.3
picture, schedule.
06:37.3
bro, manunood ako ah.
06:38.9
Bro, may live ba sa Facebook yan?
06:41.2
Yes, siguro, sadyang interesting lang
06:42.9
na may laban, may boxing,
06:44.3
kaya sila na pa-message.
06:45.5
Pero hindi naman talaga mag-memessage yun.
06:48.5
May-realize nung nila ng sarili nila yun eh,
06:51.3
na yung ginagano nyo dati,
06:53.8
yung mga inahangaan nyo na ngayon.
06:55.5
It's not an easy decision to
06:59.3
choose not to fight back kasi.
07:01.6
The more na parang magre-revenge pa ako eh,
07:04.6
huwag na, hindi na kailangan sayang sa oras.
07:07.7
what can I get from fighting back din?
07:09.9
It will just create noise.
07:12.0
And baka mas lumaki lang yung problema.
07:15.9
Hindi naman ako galit sa kanila.
07:18.4
Actually, I'm at peace with them right now.
07:20.9
In a way, thankful din ako kasi
07:24.3
if it didn't happen,
07:25.7
I think hindi din ako magiging empathic.
07:28.8
Parang I wouldn't be empathizing
07:30.8
with other people's struggles.
07:33.0
But siguro, thanks to you guys,
07:36.6
binigyan nyo ako ng another point of view,
07:38.5
another perspective in my life.
07:40.5
Thank you dahil pinarealize siya sa akin
07:43.0
na hindi ako yung taong kinakaya-kaya lang.
07:45.4
Oo, sige, fine, masakit yung mga dinanas ko.
07:47.8
Pero those pains, those fears
07:50.4
na pinaranas siya sa akin,
07:51.5
na pinakita nyo sa akin,
07:52.8
it made me to who I am right now.
07:55.2
So actually, dun sa mga nang-bully sa akin,
07:58.0
matagal ko na kayong napatawad.
08:00.1
Buti na lang mabaito.
08:02.7
Forgive is a really strong word.
08:05.0
I think I forgive the act na lang,
08:09.0
not the person per se.
08:10.7
Pero sana, nag-character change din siya.
08:14.2
Do I forgive you?
08:18.2
We just move forward.
08:19.4
Not gonna demand for you to apologize or anything.
08:22.0
Basta okay na ako.
08:23.2
Sabi ko nga sa sarili ko,
08:24.7
hindi ako nagtatanim ng sama ng loob.
08:27.2
Kasi the more na itanim ko siya sa sarili ko,
08:30.9
kung baka kakainin lang ako ng anger or hatred.
08:33.7
So mas pinili kong maging masaya,
08:37.5
para makapag-move forward na ako sa life.
08:39.8
You have to learn to forgive them also.
08:42.3
Kasi, kunyakya, five years na nakalipas.
08:45.0
Tapos, syempre makakalimutan nila yun eh.
08:49.4
attack mode ka pa rin,
08:50.5
tapos sila parang nakatayo lang.
08:52.6
If you choose to love instead,
08:56.9
be the better person,
08:59.4
I think the universe will give you a lot more
09:03.5
and bless you more.
09:08.1
I got you a love kit, by the way.
09:10.4
I dedicate this to you
09:12.6
as a token of my forgiveness,
09:17.5
even though you didn't ask.
09:20.0
So, I'm gonna give this to you
09:25.2
I've already moved forward,
09:26.8
so you deserve this love kit.
09:29.0
And maybe this love kit can help them,
09:31.2
kumbaga, ma-realize nila
09:32.5
or mag-analyze nila sa mga sarili nila na
09:35.3
stop na yung ginagawa nila kasi.
09:37.7
Andami na natin iniisip.
09:39.4
Hopefully, you've chosen
09:41.6
to brighten someone's day
09:45.7
rather than making them more miserable.
09:47.9
This one, I think it would be perfect din
09:50.0
to share with the family.
09:52.1
It also has broadies din.
09:54.8
mga paborito ko pa ito eh.
09:56.8
By just being kind
09:58.1
and spreading love and positivity,
10:00.9
yun, mabibreak na natin
10:02.4
yung ganyang cycle ng pambubuli.
10:07.0
Sa akin yung blue.
10:07.8
Sa akin yung dalawang blue.
10:13.2
sa mga bullying niyo sa akin before
10:16.4
finally, ina-accept ko na
10:18.0
yeah, mas talo ko lang minahal yung birthmark ko
10:22.2
Right now, I'm doing well.
10:23.9
Just wanna let you know na
10:25.9
Even though, I don't think you care.
10:28.2
I don't think you care.
10:35.0
A lot of struggle,
10:36.0
a lot of character development.
10:38.0
Marunong na lumaban on my own.
10:40.0
Alam ko na I am stronger now.
10:43.2
And I am more okay na
10:46.4
Like, pag inaalala ko na lang sila na
10:48.4
parang tinatawa lang ko na lang
10:50.4
or minsan, tinatawa namin mga friends ko
10:52.4
na, ah, oh, ganun ba? Okay.
10:54.0
Pero ngayon kasi,
10:56.2
mas palaban na siya lalo
10:58.2
and na-express niya na yung kung
11:00.2
anong gusto niyang sabihin sa mga tao.
11:02.4
Update sa akin na
11:04.4
hindi ako natuloy sa pagiging pro.
11:06.4
Ah, yun lang, no?
11:08.4
Kasi na-injury ako.
11:09.7
But, siguro, just like you,
11:11.7
I also have a regular job now.
11:13.7
Guma-admit na ako sa college.
11:17.7
I wish you all the best.
11:19.7
Hope that you guys
11:21.7
had that said character development
11:23.7
throughout the years.
11:24.9
I hope sana hindi nyo na siya ulitan sa ibang tao.
11:27.6
Just be kind kasi hindi na natin alam
11:30.0
kung ano yung pinagdadaanan
11:31.6
ng mga taong ibubuli nyo.
11:33.6
I don't know kung ano na yung
11:35.6
state ng life mo ngayon.
11:36.8
If you have a wife
11:38.8
and if you have kids already,
11:40.8
regards sa kanila.
11:42.8
May you have a beautiful family.
11:44.8
I just wish you all the best
11:46.8
and also with your family
11:48.8
then as well, and with your kids.
11:50.8
Number one, siguro,
11:54.0
Nagpapasalamat ako sa inyo
11:55.2
dahil ginawa nyo akong ganito.
11:56.8
Number two, sorry
11:58.8
kasi naging ganyang kayo.
12:00.8
Thank you, nabigyan mo ako ng urgency
12:02.8
para to be stronger
12:04.8
but hindi yun yung intention mo.
12:06.8
Pero thank you pa rin.
12:08.8
You don't have to say sorry
12:12.8
siguro libra mo na lang ako.
12:18.8
Best wishes, all the best.
12:20.8
Best wishes, actually.
