Vince Rapisura 2748: Chismis o Constructive? Ang Sikreto sa Epektibong Feedback!
01:25.3
So quickly, dun po sa hindi nakakilala sa akin, ako ay isang communication coach. I'm based here in Italy.
01:34.5
I'm married. We have an eight-year-old. Mag-9 na pala si Maya this coming March.
01:38.9
Ang background ko po ay originally in fashion. Tapos I pivoted into education and communication.
01:45.6
And kilala ko si Vince from RALSE Volunteering Advocacy for the last 13 years na yata. So ayan. Okay.
01:59.7
So kung iisipin natin, Vince, feedback. Tanggalin muna natin lahat ng emotions, ng preconceived ideas.
02:06.3
Ano ba yung ibig sabihin ng feedback?
02:08.9
Totoo lang, ganito lang siya eh. It's this simple, no? Parang it really is just information about reactions to either a product, okay?
02:18.6
A person's performance, yun yung pag-usapan natin today. And everything else. And used as a basis for improvement.
02:27.2
I think ito yung pinaka-importanting part sa definition ng feedback, okay? Used as a basis for improvement.
02:36.7
So kung iisipin natin,
02:38.9
lahat naman tayo nagbibigay ng feedback, diba?
02:42.7
Vince, kailan yung last time na nagbigay ka ng feedback? O baka yung sa Facebook?
02:48.5
Yan yung biligay mo?
02:54.9
Actually, madalas kami magbigay ng feedback, mga performance evaluation sa mga staff, no?
03:03.5
Pero kami, actually, ako, sa totoo lang, I went into therapy for this.
03:08.9
Doon ko na-realize na, ah, ito pala yung personality ko.
03:13.3
Nagma-matter sa akin yung recognition.
03:17.6
At ang ano niya ay, so, para to get into me, hindi ako parang, kung uunahin mo na, kritik-kritik-kritik agad.
03:30.4
Wala akong masakit.
03:31.7
Sabi, imotivate ka na.
03:32.9
Wala akong sinawa.
03:35.9
At I think, ginagawa ko, ngayon sa selfie, ginagawa.
03:38.9
Magbibigay ka muna ng ano yung mga naggustuhan mo.
03:41.9
Kasi, syempre, meron ka pa rin naggustuhan, diba?
03:47.0
Actually, that's true.
03:48.5
And we'll look at that mamaya, no?
03:49.9
Parang, the easiest thing na naalala ko dyan, yung tinatawag na hamburger approach.
03:55.1
Yun yung, meaning, yung positive muna, and then yung area of improvement, and then you end it na positive note.
04:01.8
Para, at least, alam mo yun, yung huling feeling ng tao is positive.
04:06.7
So, that's one approach.
04:11.6
So, sa totoo lang, lahat naman tayo nagbibigay ng feedback.
04:14.8
Pag kumakain tayo sa restaurant, hindi mo nagustuhan yung pagkain, feedback, diba?
04:19.2
And usually, sa ayaw natin at sa gusto, mas mahilig tayo magbigay ng negative feedback.
04:24.8
Yung positive, punti lang yung mga tao, diba?
04:29.7
Isipin mo, yung service, usually, I know, hindi ako natuwa, ano ba, balikan ko yan, negative, two stars, one star review.
04:38.9
Negative feedback.
04:40.7
Actually, alam mo, masingit ko lang ha.
04:43.3
Yung si Jonas Gaffood, isang friend ko yan, siya yung franchise holder ng Miss Universe Philippines ngayon.
04:50.2
At naalala ko, isa sa mga sinabi niya sa akin na paano niya i-train ang kanyang mga girls is,
04:56.3
pag nakita mo ang isang tao, iisip ka kaagad ng isa o dalawang maganda dyan sa taong yan.
05:04.4
At isisingit mo sa conversation.
05:06.3
It could be as simple as, I like your shirt.
05:08.9
Pero dapat genuinely coming from ano ha, na gusto mo talaga.
05:13.1
So bago ka pa mag-criticize, criticize, ang una mong titignan, ano yung carry?
05:17.4
Mas carry naman yung perspective na yun, diba?
05:20.0
Oo, no, I like that.
05:21.3
Kasi sa totoo lang, hindi masyado maraming tao ang nagko-compliment ha.
05:25.8
Parang, alam mo yun, iisipin mo, parang talaga ba gusto ko, usually, naiisip mo,
05:31.1
oy, gusto ko yung style niya, pero hindi mo sasabihin, diba?
05:33.7
So that's a very good, that's a very good discipline.
05:36.4
Iisipin mo, yung i-train mo yung sarili mo na i-compliment.
05:42.4
So, in the professional setting, sino ba usually yung nagbibigay ng feedback?
05:46.7
Well, ito, managers, team members, depende sa kultura eh ng company.
05:51.9
Pag may peer-to-peer review, then team members.
05:54.9
And then, if you're a service provider, then your customer will also give you feedback.
06:00.4
Bakit siya importante?
06:02.2
Kasi sa totoo lang, based on the definition of a feedback,
06:05.9
it's really the basis for improvement, no?
06:08.4
And data shows that employees really improve their performance after feedback is given to them.
06:17.4
Pero kailangan, syempre, depende sa kung paano binigay yung feedback.
06:22.2
Different types of feedback.
06:25.1
Yung una, yung pag-uusapan natin today, Vince, is constructive,
06:28.2
or meansan, yung tinatawag na negative feedback.
06:31.9
Upward is, I don't know kung ilan nyo nagpa-practice nito,
06:35.8
may mga companies where the bosses, the managers ask for feedback
06:40.8
galing sa mga direct reports nila.
06:45.0
Appreciation and recognition, ito yung sinasabi mo, Vince.
06:47.6
Sa totoo lang, importante ito para sa ating lahat, okay?
06:51.7
Some more than others.
06:53.7
Pero minsan, when somebody tells you, you know what, you did a really good job,
06:58.6
you know, in a specific project, or even yung right away,
07:03.6
ano yun eh, malaking bagay yun.
07:05.8
And minsan, iniisip ng mga tao, only the staff need that.
07:09.7
Sa totoo lang, hindi.
07:10.6
Even, you know, even the managers, even the owners, even founders.
07:14.7
Kailangan natin lahat ng ganyan, yung appreciation.
07:18.0
Coaching is, of course, when you're inside a coaching relationship,
07:21.6
or pag may coaching na ginagamit yung managers within the organization,
07:26.3
that's also feedback.
07:27.2
And of course, real-time feedback.
07:29.8
Yung ganyan, as an end user, we normally give feedback.
07:35.0
So either ganyan.
07:35.8
And usually nga, pag nag-feedback tayo,
07:37.8
pag hindi tayo masaya dun sa experience.
07:44.5
So, constructive feedback.
07:48.4
Incident, parang ironically, kahit pag-iisipin natin,
07:52.1
usually, yung sa mga managers or people who have to give feedback,
07:56.1
parang they feel awkward about this whole approach.
08:00.4
Pero sa totoo lang, and this is a study conducted by Harvard Business Review,
08:05.8
actually, negative or constructive feedback is a lot, is very much appreciated.
08:12.2
Yan yung hinahanap ng mga tao.
08:14.0
Yan ang gusto nilang marinig.
08:15.4
Kasi yan yung areas of improvement eh.
08:18.3
Hindi ibig sabihin yan lang yung gusto nilang marinig.
08:20.9
Kasi like you said, kung puro negative, that's demotivating.
08:25.5
Parang wala ka ng tamang ginawa, diba?
08:30.1
And here's another interesting data, Vince.
08:33.9
The older you are,
08:35.3
the more feedback you want.
08:40.2
Yung iba kasi natatakot din na magbigay ng feedback, Alex,
08:43.9
dahil nga, baka sabihin sip-sip ako, ganyan, diba?
08:48.9
So, yan yung ano.
08:50.8
So, may mga ganyang ano rin, issues.
08:54.2
Pero I thought it was interesting to highlight this.
08:56.9
Kasi parang, oh nga, siguro it takes a level of maturity to say,
09:02.1
Sige, tell me what I need to work on.
09:05.3
Um, siguro pag mas bata, medyo mas kailangan mo yung,
09:10.6
medyo mas kailangan soft yung approach, diba?
09:14.0
And you need more positive reinforcement.
09:17.7
Tapos, tsaka ka palang magiging ready for the constructive feedback.
09:21.7
So, ayan, especially in cultures, collectivist cultures, no?
09:25.5
Kagaya nga ng Pilipinas, na napaka-indirect ng form of communication natin.
09:30.3
Um, kailangan paligoy-ligoy.
09:35.3
Minsan, feedback can be associated with, you know, some sort, a level of embarrassment.
09:43.5
Minsan, confusing.
09:44.9
Kasi nga, nakakapaligoy-ligoy.
09:47.7
Nalilito ka na parang hindi mo na alam kung ano yung talagang point ng feedback.
09:52.1
And in that case, it becomes frustrating, diba?
09:58.0
I think isa din na magandang gawin, kapag ikaw nagbigay ng feedback,
10:03.0
hindi lang yung one way na,
10:05.3
sabi mo, tapos na.
10:06.7
I think, kailangan din na makinig ka, diba?
10:09.7
Kasi, you also have to listen.
10:11.7
Hindi po pwedeng ikaw lang yung salita ng salita, eh, in terms of feedback giving.
10:17.7
Sa tuno lang, Vince, dapat kasi yung feedback,
10:19.8
hindi yan tinitreat na parang, okay, seramunan kita, diba?
10:25.4
Dapat bibigyan mo ng pagkakataon na sumagot yung tao.
10:28.8
Kasi, kung feeling niya, hindi tama yung observation mo,
10:33.5
or kung gusto niyang magpaliwanag,
10:36.1
that person should feel safe enough to say so, no?
10:40.9
Hindi naman yung sabihin, diba?
10:42.5
Pero, ganun yun, eh.
10:44.6
Hindi siya one way na, okay, makinig ka, sabihin ko sa'yo kung anong problema, diba?
10:50.6
So, constructive feedback.
10:52.7
Ano ba itsura niyan?
10:54.4
So, una-una, syempre, objective, okay, and tactful.
10:57.8
Well, yung tact, hindi naman natin problema yan, eh.
11:00.2
Mga Pilipino, we're normally extremely polite.
11:03.5
Super polite pa nga.
11:06.4
Minsan, magsusorry pa bago mo, magkakaroon ng feedback na bago.
11:10.0
Sorry ha, pero I have to.
11:13.3
Clear and actionable.
11:15.0
Ito yung importante rin.
11:16.4
Again, minsan, kakasugarcoat mo ng gusto mong sabihin.
11:20.5
Hindi na tuloy clear kung ano yung gusto mong sabihin.
11:25.6
And then, yes, it comes from a place of helpfulness and empathy.
11:31.3
You know, if you know na,
11:32.5
what you're about to say is for the person's personal growth,
11:37.4
well, then, makikita mo yun, eh, sa tono nung sinasabi mo.
11:42.8
And then, there, yeah, given from a growth point of view,
11:48.1
genuine and sincere.
11:49.5
Of course, yung authenticity is super important.
11:54.4
So, kung yun ang constructive feedback,
11:56.5
ano naman yung hindi constructive feedback?
12:00.2
Or, you know, what's destructive feedback?
12:02.5
Hindi yan paraan para gumante or to offend someone personally.
12:09.4
And this is what a lot of people fear, no?
12:13.5
Parang feedback, oh my gosh, yan na yung time na gagantihan ako nito.
12:18.8
And that shouldn't be the case.
12:21.9
It's not about blaming the other person.
12:25.2
Hindi yan pagkahataon para sabihin, ah, kasi if you did this, maganda sana yung resulta ng project.
12:30.5
It's not an excuse to microphone.
12:32.5
It's not an excuse to micromanage either.
12:33.8
Hindi pag nagbigay ng feedback, sabihin mo,
12:36.4
I can say, you didn't perform well from now on,
12:39.7
ito, parang babantayan na kita sa bawat ano mo.
12:42.3
Hindi rin yan yun.
12:44.9
Actually, ang goal ng ano, lalo na in the workplace, no,
12:48.3
ang goal ng feedbacking is para dumali ang buhay ng bawat isa,
12:54.8
hindi para saluhin mo at maging independent sila sa iyo, diba?
13:01.6
So, dapat ganun palagi, yung parang babalikan mo yun, bakit, ano nga ba yung purpose ng feedback?
13:08.1
So, if you keep that in mind, I think, you'll be okay.
13:12.9
So, sa totoo lang, the real challenge with feedback is hindi naman the feedback itself,
13:18.1
it's how you give it, how you communicate.
13:23.3
Actually, alam mo yung isang classic dyan na naalala ko, ito naman yung mga high school, ganyan,
13:27.9
yung mga may body odor.
13:35.6
Yung parang, no, you know, funny kasi the other day, naisip ko yan na yung,
13:40.3
minsan, pag kunyari, may kausap ka, diba, yung kaibigan mo,
13:43.5
yung kaibigan mo, she has something either between her teeth or yung pag yung,
13:48.4
sa amin naman, pag yung lipstick na nasa ngipin, na parang,
13:52.2
paano mo sasabihin without putting that person on the spot?
13:58.7
Kasi parang, that's feedback.
13:60.0
Pero at the same time,
14:01.6
off ka, kasi ayaw mo naman siya mapahiya.
14:04.3
Meron pa yung isang funny experience.
14:06.5
Ito, last year lang ito.
14:09.3
So, nagpunta ko sa office,
14:10.7
ang busy-busy, diba?
14:12.0
Naglagay ako ng, ano,
14:13.2
naglagay ako ng sunblock,
14:16.1
pero may foundation,
14:17.1
pero hindi ko pa na-spread,
14:20.2
nalimutan ko na siyang spread.
14:21.7
Hindi ko na nakita,
14:22.5
yung ano ko sa salobin ko,
14:31.6
Tapos, sabi nila,
14:34.8
sir, akala namin,
14:40.8
akala nila, okay,
14:44.4
ay, sir, bagong passion ba yan?
14:46.1
Bakit ganyan yung mukha?
14:49.1
Nakakainis, diba?
14:50.9
Yes, pero you know what?
14:55.0
that's the perfect example.
14:57.3
I don't know how to approach
14:58.9
those situations, no?
15:04.0
it was an interview
15:07.0
I'm a huge fan of hers,
15:08.7
and the interviewer,
15:12.1
yata sa mukha niya,
15:13.5
and ang sabi niya,
15:15.5
and she was being interviewed
15:16.7
with someone else.
15:18.8
and this was already live,
15:22.3
I know you will do this
15:25.5
if it happened to me.
15:27.3
I just need to tell you
15:29.1
that you have a pen mark
15:33.1
that's the perfect way
15:35.5
alam ko gagawin nito,
15:39.5
gusto ko sabihin sa iyo
15:41.0
parang matanggal mo siya.
15:43.8
that's the perfect way
15:47.6
an awkward situation
15:56.4
ano ba yung checklist
15:58.0
para makapag-deliver tayo
15:59.4
ng effective feedback?
16:06.0
Hindi pwedeng mga
16:09.1
na walang direksyon.
16:14.1
timing is very important
16:15.4
kasi hindi pa pwedeng sabihin,
16:17.2
if you notice something,
16:20.5
it doesn't have to be
16:21.7
immediately after,
16:22.6
pero hindi naman din pwedeng,
16:26.9
yung performance mo,
16:29.3
ang layo na nun eh.
16:31.0
And which is why,
16:33.5
give the person time
16:35.1
to act on that feedback.
16:36.7
Pero you can't do that
16:37.8
kung six months down the line
16:41.4
It has to be linked to
16:43.1
what's expected of that person,
16:45.3
It can't be something na parang,
16:47.2
wala ka talagang masabi,
16:50.3
ng ibang feedback,
16:52.8
kahit nasa tito lang,
16:53.8
hindi naman yung part
16:57.4
Focus on the task.
16:59.4
This is super important.
17:00.5
And that's exactly
17:06.5
you're not attacking the person.
17:11.8
focus on strategies,
17:15.8
pag sinabi mo dun sa tao,
17:17.0
ito yung areas of improvement,
17:20.0
you want to give that person
17:24.4
to see how he or she
17:26.4
can approach things better.
17:28.0
Huwag mong sasabihin,
17:28.8
ito yung gawin mo.
17:32.1
people are more empowered
17:34.3
pag binigyan mo sila
17:40.2
paano nila susolusyonan yun?
17:43.2
yung isa sa mga ginagawa namin
17:46.6
kapag nag-feedback giving,
17:48.8
so magbibigay ka na ng,
17:50.2
ano yung mga nagustuhan mo,
17:52.6
areas for improvement.
17:55.7
ang pag-uusapan nyo dun ay,
17:59.4
ano yung maitutulong ko sa iyo
18:03.1
to make this improve?
18:05.2
ano yung gusto mong tulong
18:10.8
very, very good practice, Vince.
18:16.0
they feel supported.
18:17.3
Hindi yung parang,
18:19.0
alam mo na gagawin,
18:20.0
good luck to you, diba?
18:22.9
see you in the next review.
18:26.0
that's a really good,
18:26.7
that's a really good approach.
18:30.9
so, we're on the checklist.
18:32.4
And finally, of course,
18:33.9
it has to be actionable
18:37.4
pag may bibigay ng feedback,
18:39.4
you want to be realistic then
18:41.2
with what the person can do
18:43.2
given the time frame.
18:45.2
Don't give them yung feedback na,
18:48.5
parang they have to take
18:49.7
10 steps to reach that.
18:52.0
Kasi, pag gano'n,
18:53.9
it's demotivating.
18:58.3
ito yung comfort zone na,
18:59.8
when you give feedback
19:00.9
that's actionable
19:03.3
you're just asking the person
19:04.7
to step a little bit
19:06.6
out of their comfort zone.
19:10.6
pwede nila yung gawin.
19:11.4
Pero, if you're expecting them
19:12.8
to do so much more,
19:15.4
parang sinabi mo na,
19:18.6
it's not realistic,
19:22.8
it's not effective at all.
19:30.1
lalo na sa ating mga Pilipino,
19:32.1
we really have to make
19:33.8
the implicit explicit.
19:37.2
don't assume anything.
19:41.3
lahat ng kailangan mong sabihin,
19:43.7
to make sure everything
19:44.8
is out in the open.
19:47.4
gusto ko yung sinabi mo,
19:50.9
ano yung sa tingin mo
19:51.7
po pwedeng gawin?
19:52.8
what can I do to help?
19:56.3
that's a very good way
19:57.8
Dito yung mga examples,
20:01.9
you tell them in advance,
20:03.6
kung meron tayong
20:05.9
may tough conversation
20:07.4
or may feedback ako
20:12.7
what's the best way
20:15.0
ano yung preferred way mo
20:18.4
kasi may iba-iba tayong
20:19.4
communication skills.
20:20.5
Some people receive
20:27.5
kung sasabihin mo
20:29.4
I want to do this
20:30.5
because I want to make sure
20:31.9
that I'm not offending you,
20:34.2
that you know that I have
20:35.5
your best interest in mind.
20:54.7
a quote that I chose
20:57.8
sums up everything
21:04.7
not a performance review.
21:11.5
and receiving feedback.
21:14.5
if we keep in mind
21:15.6
what the feedback
21:19.5
helping that person
21:23.0
the rest of the organization,
21:24.8
it's not going to be
21:28.1
It's not going to be
21:33.9
about how we deliver it.
21:37.5
if we keep this in mind,
21:40.4
let's normalize it.
21:41.7
Huwag yung parang,
21:42.6
once a year lang,
21:44.8
kinakabahan ka na
21:46.4
malapit na yung date na yun
21:47.9
because it feels like
21:49.5
because right now,
21:50.7
that's what a lot of
21:53.8
They give feedback
21:59.4
ibigay ako ng training
22:02.7
natin sa Hong Kong.
22:03.5
So, marami sa kanila
22:04.3
mga domestic workers,
22:08.6
syempre may kasama ko
22:10.5
at sinabi ko sa kanil,
22:11.8
tinanong ko sa kanila,
22:12.8
ano yung best way
22:15.6
yung kasama namin
22:18.4
ibibigay ko na feedback
22:19.4
or instruction sa kanya
22:22.5
At alam mo yung sabi
22:24.1
syempre hindi ko na maalala
22:25.7
kung sino yung nagsabi
22:26.6
sa akin sa kanila,
22:27.4
pero ang sabi niya,
22:28.1
alam mo Sir Vince,
22:31.8
ayaw naman niya talagang
22:33.0
yung siyang magkamali.
22:35.2
So, kung mayroon siyang
22:38.4
sabihin mo sa kanya agad
22:40.6
para hindi siya magkamali.
22:54.1
since iba-iba talaga tayo
22:55.6
ng communication style
22:57.7
and iba-iba talaga
22:59.9
of communication.
23:05.1
what's going to work
23:08.7
kung mali mo yung premise
23:10.1
na I'm here to help,
23:11.6
we're here to help
23:15.1
mayroon talagang mga tao
23:16.9
they'll still be offended.
23:21.5
you did your part.
23:26.5
ng ating usapan ngayon.
23:28.0
Tungkol sa feedback giving.
23:31.3
at papakita ko sa mga...
23:40.3
So, thank you so much, Vince.
23:42.4
This has been another
23:48.2
for this opportunity.
23:51.0
Para po dun sa mga
23:53.3
or dun sa mga manunood
23:55.9
please connect with me.
24:01.2
and I'm also on YouTube.
24:02.9
So, kung may mga katanungan
24:04.8
about communications
24:06.6
or presentations,
24:09.9
to drop me a line,
24:11.4
send me a message,
24:12.7
and pag-uusapan po
24:16.2
Maraming, maraming salamat,
24:18.5
At mag-uusapan tayo
24:23.4
Naku, Valentines,
24:24.6
pag-ibig na naman
24:25.4
pag-uusapan natin.
24:28.0
Pag-iibig na naman nga.
24:30.5
Baka may kasunod na yung
24:34.2
Ang engagement ring.
24:35.5
Nagpag-asala kaya sila
24:37.1
O baka break na sila.
24:41.9
And see you next month.
24:43.7
See you next month.
